Things You Should Never Say to Pregnant Women
It's incredible how soon co-workers, strangers, and even family members forget that a pregnant woman is still a person. Curious questions, while understandable, frequently straddle the line from interested to critical. Your parents may be dying to know whether you'll quit your job after baby, and your neighbor wants to know if you intend to breast-feed or not, for example. Remember that prying inquiries are usually better left unsaid when in doubt.
When I was six months pregnant, I was inspired to create this post. I only weighed about 11 pounds more than normal. I'd already shown the family back home a few bump pictures at their request, and one of those responses I got was "Oh my gosh, YOU'RE HUGE! He's going to be a BIG BABY!"
If you haven't been pregnant before, you may not be aware that having a baby in your stomach causes your hormones to GO CRAZY. Oh, and did I mention that you're hungry all the time? It's impossible for you to sleep; you have to pee every ten minutes; and you're gaining weight faster than ever before. It's like playing a game of Russian Roulette when it comes to assessing a pregnant woman's weight; she might not care one way or the other, or she may cut you with a pair of scissors.
Here are the top things you should never say to a pregnant woman. Share with your family, friends, and even that annoying co-worker.
1. “Wow, you’re huge!”
Keep it to yourself. A pregnant woman will typically acquire a few pounds of weight. Commenting on her size will make her feel self-conscious and uncomfortable.
2. “When are you due?”
Again, this is a question that is better left unasked. A woman’s delivery date is typically confidential information.
3. “Are you going to breastfeed?”
This is a personal choice that should be made by the mother. Unless the mother brings up breastfeeding herself, it is probably best to avoid bringing it up.
4. “Have you picked out a name yet?”
A woman typically doesn't like talking about her unborn child’s name. She has spent months thinking of that perfect name only for strangers to jump in with their own suggestions. Save the name discussion for after the baby is born.
5. “You really shouldn’t eat/drink/do that when you’re pregnant.”
Pregnant women should always consult with their doctor about what is safe for them to do. It is important to remember that every pregnancy is different, so what may be safe for one woman may not be safe for another. You really shouldn’t give a pregnant woman advice.
6. “By the way you’re showing, I bet you’re having…”
By the way, telling a pregnant woman she is expecting twins or some other surprise is not okay.
7. “Sleep now because you will never sleep again.”
This is only half of the truth. Things will change once the baby comes, but new parents can still enjoy some down time during naptime and nighttime.
8. “Was it a surprise?”
This question can be personal for some women. If they want to share the news of their pregnancy, they will do so. It is best not to ask this question if you are not close friends or family.
9. “Well, when I was pregnant…”
Every pregnancy is different and every woman experiences different symptoms. Telling your story about how you suffered through morning sickness or had to give birth via C-section is not helpful or necessary.
10. “Are you going to have a natural birth?”
Again, every pregnancy and birth is unique. If a woman wants to share her birth plan with you, she will—or if it’s none of your business, she won’t.
By: April Carson